A little sweet and a little tart….but soooo good. Just like a few of the relationships we get attached to. We are so blinded by the sweetness, we rarely notice the tartness. However that tartness doesn’t always have a positive effect on us mentally.
We let tartness build up internally. Trying to hold on to the “sweet” times, we don’t express ourselves until that tartness has developed into bitterness. I’ve witnessed the fall of many friendships due to the overwhelming amount of tartness, and not enough sweetness. By sweetness, I mean…love, kindness, patience, etc.
In a lot of relationships (friendships, courtship, marriages) there are amazingly sweet moments and some “not so sweet” tart moments. Its those “not so sweet” tart moments that clouds our judgement and causes us to forget about the sweetness of our relationships.
During the tart times we have to remember…
“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” -1 Corinthians 4-7 NLT
We have to focus on love when we start to feel tart–bitterness or resentment–or just down right uneasy about a situation.
Everyone isn’t going to agree on the same things. Everybody will have different points-of-views, convictions, interests, and hobbies.
..what we should all have in common is our love for the Lord. However, that main– and very important factor— just isn’t enough for some people, I guess.
So what do you do when a decision that has been made by a friend is wrong?
As a friend, you shed truth on the situation and call them out on their wrongdoings… however you don’t do it from a place of judgement–or false truth–you do it from a place of love.
Remember… calling out a friend on their faults can be a pretty sensitive situation..
We can’t judge or be prideful, that isn’t of God. Your attitude can lead that person to fall in Christ. Just because you believe something is wrong, does not mean the other person has that same conviction. (Romans 14:23)
How do you handle it? Well ask yourself… (1 Corinthians)
Does it help my witness for Christ? (9:19-22)
Am I motivated by a desire to help others know Christ? (9:23, 10:33)
Does it help me to do my best? Does it help them to do their best? (9:25)
Is it the best and most beneficial course of action? (10:23, 33)
Am I thinking only of myself, or do I truly care about the other person? (10:24)
Am I acting lovingly or selfishly? (10:28-31)
Does it glorify God? (10:31)
Will it cause the other person to sin? (10:32)
[adapted from Life Application Study Bible NLT]
Being mindful of how we speak to one another and choosing our words carefully can go a long way in any situation. Thats the basis of maintaining a healthy relationship.
Don’t fight about issues that are just a matter of opinion–instead agree to appreciate each others differences and be patient towards each other. Accept them for who they are. (Romans 14:1) But be respectful towards each others beliefs and differences..
A healthy relationship allows us to enjoy the sweet times and appreciate the tart moments. Let’s face it.. you can’t have a healthy relationship without one or the other.
Thats why sweet and tart is always sooooo YUMMY in life!